Much of what happens in our life is not final or permanent. It is a training ground for something else, something greater and better that is yet to come. This is as much true of relationships as of everything else. Therefore it is best to regard all that happens as a provisional scheme and use it to feed our spiritual hunger, the hunger for true love, for a true life, for a diviner mode of living, for a greater and higher perfection. Those who are destined for this greater aim often face this kind of situation since they are born for higher striving. For others, the aim is to somehow find happiness of a mundane kind which is rather easy to find though it seldom lasts, and they spend their life pursuing these small things through outwards means. If we don’t belong to the latter kind of humanity, our life gives us challenges, and those who strive for the extraordinary goals are often given extraordinary challenges. The higher the goal the greater is needed self-preparation.
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t is best for a seeker to take all these experiences as steps in the great journey towards a goal, even if it is still vague. We can try to formulate the goal with clarity, that is to say, try to give a more concrete form to the idea of self-improvement, reflect upon what is our idea and ideal of a close relationship, develop our heart and the intellect by going deeper into these experiences, their real meaning and what they have comer to teach.
When a particular relationship reaches its limits (12 years is generally the maximum one can try to change a relationship or goals, though generally 7 years are sufficient), it is perhaps time to reset our emotions, their direction and goals. Best is to turn them towards the Divine by laying bare our heart to the Mother and offering our love and devotion at Her Feet, leaving the rest to Her to do what She Wills. But we should not stop halfway because our partner refuses to change. The only person we can change is ourselves and it is there that we must focus. So we may need to continue the journey, in fact with a renewed vigor since now we can have with us the energy we were investing in the relationship. We need to take all this as a Grace and in time we’ll see that indeed it is so.
