To be attached is to remain tied to the ordinary earth nature. To love is to soar upwards, ever upwards beyond the highest heavens, beyond even the gods.
In each life we are given certain possibilities of growth and progress. If we miss that opportunity then we have to still do it but under even more difficult circumstances.
The perpetual wheel of destiny that carries our lives in a cosmic pool of chance and uncertainty can be very frightening. This is especially so for a man who believes that he can control and micromanage all the events and circumstances of his life.
But what is the Origin of THAT of which nothing can be said? Well, regardless of whether we call IT a shunyam or God or Divine or Nothing the question would still stand.
When one does not know what one is really looking for and the seeking is still vague, it may be best to start with the Letters on Yoga, The Mother and Sri Aurobindo on Himself.