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At the Feet of The Mother

Discipline and Freedom

One of the big challenges of modern times is to find the right balance between Discipline and Freedom. A generation or two earlier the limits of freedom and the needed discipline were defined externally by the social and cultural milieu in which one lived. But since the late nineteen sixties the old matrix of socio-religious and cultural formulas have been more or less broken down the world over. The breakdown had of course started much earlier as the social-cultural and religious forces had slowly become hardened and rigid, narrow and stifling to man’s innate urge for freedom. An inner revolt was already simmering below the surface which found expression as the two great wars in the previous century rocked humanity and the scientific-industrial revolution focused increasingly on individualism. Now the surviving relics of this past stick either in rigid fortresses full of darkness with cobwebs of unenlightened thoughts surrounding them or else remain a lip-service to decorate a crumbling building, a hypocrisy and a façade. The younger generation is bound to reject both and they are doing it everywhere.

But the urgent question is what next? The old bases have been demolished and the new is yet to be established. This is a perfect moment for confusion, aimlessness and meaninglessness to step in and fill the old gap. That is where the danger lies. We cannot bring back the old and we cannot witness with unmoved eyes as the angels may do, the demolition of the cherished ramparts. Here we believe that parents and teachers, or in one word educators have big role to play.  However in our enthusiasm to cure the malady we should be careful not to make the disease worse. That is what we end up doing when we try to enforce old belief systems and patterns of life by force. Gone are the days when children would dutifully obey the parents simply because ‘they are elders’ and ‘supposedly wiser’. Blind authority by age or relationship is gone. That has been done away with by the Age of Reason itself. For everything, the children need reason, reason to follow a rule, reason to study, reason to do this and not do that. Mere authority of a religious book or holy scripture no more works. And where it works it is even worse. For then it is read with a blind eye and not with an enlightened heart. The first thing therefore for parents and teachers is to respect the spirit of the Age which demands a thorough enquiry and not blind belief. It is an exacting process since most of us are not equipped or trained to exercise our logical and analytical faculties beyond the sphere of our work. We need to catch up with these inner faculties that we have lost largely through disuse, simply because we took things for granted or accepted them without questioning. Blind belief is to be replaced with an enlightened understanding and enforced discipline with a rational control over our impulses.

But there is more to it. Given a choice children more readily opt for freedom. They see the two, freedom and discipline as being opposed to each other. But in reality the two are complimentary if we understand rightly what freedom is and what discipline is? Freedom is not doing what we want to do? It is the ability to master and control ourselves so much so that we can be free of al external influences and be our own master. Right now we are slaves, slaves to every passing fancy and impulses of the moment, slaves of every suggestion that strikes our brain, even slaves to all that we read without giving a thought and applying ourselves. Discipline, on the other hand gives us true freedom, the mastery over ourselves and our environment. But that is not how we understand it at the moment. Discipline gives us knowledge and power which set us free. Discipline also gives us joy, a subtler and greater and enduring joy which is other than the momentary thrill of a passing pleasure.

However, Discipline, as we generally understand is something external, a forced control over ourselves, a deliberate act whereby we obey someone else because that is what we are told to do or that is what is demanded or expected of us. This is of course one facet of discipline but it does not carry us very far. Such externally driven discipline breaks down at the first opportunity. Our everyday life is full of examples of people who were very well-behaved so to say outwardly, but were discovered to be giving expression to dark impulses in private life. Such a ‘well-behaved’ exterior may be satisfying to our superficial idea of goodness but it does not carry us very far in life. Discipline, like everything else has to be a conscious choice, made in freedom, a choice of our enlightened parts imposed upon our lower instincts and impulses. The parents and teachers have failed if they have not been able to uncover and ignite this enlightened part that is hidden in everyone of us. While in the beginning the educators are the substitute of these higher parts of humanity (a tough role to play) but their role is to awaken the inner teacher that is there in every child. It is the difference between someone else showing you the light always and igniting the light within you. The former can only be a temporary substitute for the latter. And there is nothing better to do this than the silent example and the occult influence of the educators upon the child. A teacher who has mastery over oneself spontaneously helps the students to gain mastery over themselves without as much as speaking a word. A teacher or a parent, who loses control over himself, lets off easily in an outburst of anger or fit of agitation is a poor example and unknowing to himself and even with best of intentions, he infects the child with the virus of anger and revolt, agitation and restlessness. The dictum physician heal thyself applies here too as teachers and parents control thyself first!

Discipline in its truest essence is the art and science of channelizing one’s energies and efforts in a desired direction. It is an internal process and applies as much while playing football as during our studies. In fact one of best and simplest of ways for disciplining a child is to engage him in some regular and methodical physical education. He will enjoy it and through this activity he will learn the art of mastering himself. Similarly simple exercises of concentration taught in an interesting and engaging manner, possibly coupled with some simple rewards can go a long way in training the mind to channelize the energies. Simple games such as Mikado and Carrom can be very helpful. Vigorous exercises and workouts also help by throwing away accumulated energies of anger and such impulses in a healthy sublimated manner. They create an alternate and healthy means for expression and thereby diminish revolt and anger, sex and violence. To sum it up we may well say that discipline is best practiced through outdoor games rather than within the confines of a restricting classroom or through big and boring lectures.

There is also the big role of stories that shape our young and impressionable minds, especially at a younger age. A careful selection of stories, a proper story time in class and at home would be helpful provided we make a careful selection. The stories should be interestingly given and engaging, not those overtly moral ones that do not engage the child’s attention. The moral of the story should run as an undercurrent, something covert and not too explicit. As the child grows up and outgrows the fantasy world the stories should also be more realistic or better still real life events should be made a subject for open, free and frank discussion. We have a tendency to keep certain subjects as taboo and out-of-scope for discussion. But the dharma of this Age demands that we discuss everything under the sun but logically, coherently and dispassionately as an enlightened observer and not a passionate evangelist preaching one particular way of life or trying to convince and convert the student by all kinds of jumbled up and incoherent thoughts. Children see through it very soon and even if they nod a ‘yes’ at the moment simply to avoid ‘wasting’ more of their time, in their heart there is a ‘no’. In real life however, it is only what the heart has accepted and the mind has understood that brings an authentic change.