To transform someone needs one to have the transforming power which implies that the person engaged in this effort already has arrived at a reasonable transformation within to be able to help in another person’s transformation. Marriage or even love is not needed for this sort of an action but just points of contact and opening of the other person to the power of transformation. Nobody can be transformed against their will. That is the secret that the Mother discovered after She tried transforming people with an overeager Compassion. It did not work out since the needed base of Truth is missing which is what the Supermind is supposed to build. Most importantly the mission and work of one’s life is not decided by the mind but springs up from the depths of the soul. Transformation is a work specifically taken up by the Mother and cannot be done by anyone else either for oneself or others. Others can become direct or indirect instrument of some aspect of this vast and complex process by opening to Her and if she so Wills.
As to marriage, there is no certain way how things will work out (or not work out) between two people. But it is good if the starting point is a love from both sides, which is spontaneously springing up from some deep formless ground of being. This love is different from surface attractions or mental calculations. The second important thing is the common aspiration and goal otherwise life begins to drift in two different directions. The third and last consideration is a matching of affinities, attitudes, approaches and interests. It is one thing to see those things and quite another to test them on the ground of earthly realities. Yet if one must take a chance this is the best possible approach. The rest is a question of destiny and the ways of the Divine with our humanity.
