Sri Aurobindo

Letters of Sri Aurobindo

Volume 2. 1937

Letter ID: 1896

Sri Aurobindo — Nirodbaran Talukdar

April 2, 1937

4.30 p.m.

Guru, finished! My concentration, peace, bliss, all gone! At this moment I am dull, dull like clay and hence am compelled to write and groan.

After I wrote about the experience, the thing gradually melted away. Why? The devil knows. All I have done, if they can come under any criminal section, is that I have enjoyed some food with Anilkumar and Nishikanta, and narrated the experience to X.

That would have been better left undone.

... Suddenly to drop into an underground cell is, I don’t know what.

Everybody drops. I have dropped myself thousands of times during the sadhana. What rose-leaf princess sadhaks you all are!

Sometimes I cannot but subscribe to S’s opinion that this Yoga is not for us... Some say the preliminary stage is the same in all Yogas; only the later stage is difficult here. I don’t think it is true, for here, from the very start, it works for the change of nature, working to the very details, which other Yogas know nothing about. They leave the nature out altogether.

According to those who have practised them, in the old Yogas one has to be prepared to pass 12 years simply disciplining, disciplining without a single experience before one can expect as a right any single experience. If one gets experiences so much the better, but one can’t expect or claim.

Therefore one has to build a strong foundation; consequently more time, more bricks, more work, more money, etc., are needed. Then how can the initial stage be the same as in other Yogas?

Allow me to point out that here there are any number of people who have had experiences which would be highly prized outside. There are even one or two who have had the Brahman realisation in a single year. But it is the fashion here to shout and despair and say we have got nothing and nobody can get anything in this Yoga. I believe the pretensions of the Pondicherry sadhaks to have an easy and jolly canter to the goal or else think themselves baffled martyrs would be stared at with surprise in any other Asram.

Perhaps or certainly, you are giving Force to K’s baby, but why no visible effect? He is an infant, no resistance on his side... You cured D’s acute abscess in the abdomen, simply by your Force and no medicine. Where is the trouble here?

Don’t talk nonsense. It is because he is an infant that the Force cannot work easily on him. D is not an infant.

I am rather worried. No blessed opening in any direction. One has to grope and grope. You don’t give any blessed intuition either!

The Mother has no intuition for medicines for infants – You must find out yourself.

If you like, I will completely stop all medicines and leave him to you and Mother.

That we cannot tell you to do. It could only have been guaranteed at the beginning and with a proper mental atmosphere in the people.

Shall I report twice a day about the baby?

Yes, certainly.