Sri Aurobindo

Letters of Sri Aurobindo

Volume 2. 1937

Letter ID: 1994

Sri Aurobindo — Nirodbaran Talukdar

July 11, 1937

This boil paining all the time. Please do something, otherwise I can’t do anything.

Why so boiled by a boil?

I am simply fomenting it 3 or 4 times a day. Anything else?

I suppose there is nothing else to do.

I suppose these physical impurities are due to the vital, what?

Eventually, yes.

You know how my vital is. You must have scented it from up there! Still you want us to write [5.7.37].

It is you who proposed writing and I thought it better to let the pen draw something out.

Otherwise you won’t act and will let us go on suffering. Divine Law, I suppose, what?

My dear Sir, I suffer the Divine Law myself – damned slow affair.

... I have now no push at all for sadhana; vital is peace-less, restless and unhappy. Can’t concentrate at all. Life is dull and deathlike in consequence!

Well, what can you expect if you go on yielding either within or without to temptation like that? It sets you at strife with your own mind and higher vital, to say nothing of the psychic.

... Darshan is approaching and I can’t remain in this condition and come to you with a glum face, to see you glum too.

I won’t be glum – I shall receive you with a cheerful grunt.

I kept myself steady for a couple of months, why the devil not one month more? You will say – a usual feature in Yoga. That is no comfort to me. I’m getting discouraged.

Rubbish! Be a spider.

... It’s all an old story, Sir, and it will repeat itself till – ?

Till your vital physical consents to its being kicked out – which may be, if not tomorrow, day after tomorrow if it chooses.