But look at his prose. It seems to be becoming more and more brilliant. Why this difference?Sri Aurobindo
Letters of Sri Aurobindo
Volume 2. 1936
Letter ID: 1813
Sri Aurobindo — Nirodbaran Talukdar
December 28, 1936
I heard that X has a deep, very deep respect for you, if nothing else. He has followed closely your development, always... Hasn’t he said after the interview with you – “You have the Word and we are waiting to accept it from you...”?
That was a long time ago. He is disappointed that I have not come out and started giving lectures in America and saving humanity. Sorry, but I have no intention of doing these things.
Though he seems to have criticised some principles enunciated by you, I think he has a genuine belief in your mission, and a faith that a new creation will start from you as the fountain-head. Am I wrong, Guru, though you make us wait and wait for years and years?
You want me to start going about and giving lectures? Sorry again, but quite out of the question.
His prose-poems are not good, if you have seen any. Is it because his grey matter has become greyer by age?
It is quite natural – he is fagged out. It is true Sophocles wrote one of his grandest dramas when he was – well, was it 70 or 80 years old?
Or is it because you don’t support him any longer with your force?
?
[Sri Aurobindo put a question mark.]
But look at his prose. It seems to be becoming more and more brilliant. Why this difference?
Prose is a different matter. One can always write prose.
You kept silent about the sonnet. If your pen can’t gallop, you can ask it to trot?
Very little chance of it. The only time I tried, a surrealist poem came out1 – so I have dropped the attempt.
My poetic judgment seems to be very poor, Guru, or is it because my own poem is now in question?
Nobody can really form a proper judgment of his own poetry – or at least only one poet here and there can perform that miracle.
Really, I don’t know what to do now – how to strike a new path? Already the difficulty in writing is great, and then to avoid J’s influence! I don’t know if I shall be able to write at all. My head is threatening to break!
As usual, anticipating trouble and misery! Your position is always “That’s got to be done. Oh what a bother. I shall never do it” – while it should be “Ah, that’s to be done? All right then, it’s going to be done.”
I have lost all my distinctiveness – can’t find a new one. And yet you say “Are you ever satisfied?” Sadhana sluggish, poetry bosh, joy and peace vaporised!
Poetry is not bosh – and joy, peace need not vaporise unless you pump them out of yourself instead of into yourself.
Why, Sir, dissatisfaction itself is a sign of a greater seeking, isn’t it?
It is generally a twisting round and round in the same place round the centre of one’s own dissatisfaction.
I don’t know that you are satisfied with my condition either.
I am not depressed by it at any rate.
You promised to send me a sonnet to show how a “direct prayer” can be made strong in the couplet – don’t you remember?
That was not a sonnet.
But now I ask you for either that or to compose a mystic poem with the lines I have suggested. It won’t take you more than 5 minutes.
[Sri Aurobindo underlined “5” and put a question mark against it.]
Nonsense, I am not such a galloper.
By the way, please have a glance at page 12 of The Hindu, regarding K’s opinion of Guruship. We thought him a sensible fellow, especially after his big sacrifice – giving up all the huge estates that were given to him.
He seems to be a well-intentioned fellow but rather a bit of an empty sort of goose. The twaddle he talks is simply awful.
J is puzzled by her poems... If she is puzzled, hardly necessary to speak about myself.
Will see whether I can wrestle with it tomorrow.
1 “Surrealist”, SABCL, vol.5 (Collected Poems), p. 113.