People say that the Yogis of other Yogas can lead a better life with less difficulty. For they seldom need to touch their lower nature. They merely keep it quiet by the force of their higher or inner being. Since they consider the world as Maya, these Yogis do not bother to fix the true consciousness in the lower being. But is it not rather an excuse for not leading a yogic life?
All that is simply an excuse. The Yogis of other Yogas do at least try to keep the lower nature quiet by tapasya; they do not think it quite the right and normal thing to indulge it. If the rule of this Yoga is to change the lower nature, those who follow it must similarly try to do that, not consider it the right and normal thing to indulge the lower nature.
Many sadhaks here do not seem to care for any psychic or spiritual development. They prefer to give a greater importance to the intellectual pursuits.
It is quite true that hardly any try to lead a truly Yogic life by fixing the true consciousness in all the being. Some experience and a contented ordinariness seems to be the rule.
You ask, “What circumstances? A Yogi or seeker of Yoga is supposed to lead the Yogic life in all circumstances.” I had meant the present circumstances of the sadhana, when so many have fallen into the clutches of the physical, and the lowest and darkest nature remains always so prominent.
If the prominence of the lower nature is a good reason for not trying to live the Yogic life instead of the ordinary one, then it is also a good reason for not doing Yoga at all. The business of the seeker of Yoga is to overcome the lower nature, and for that he must try to lead the Yogic life and not sit contentedly in the lower nature.
Under such conditions how are we to fix the true consciousness in all the being and lead the Yogic life in all circumstances?
Everybody has to deal with the lower nature. No Yoga can be done without overcoming it, neither this Yoga nor any other. A Yogic life means a life in which one tries to follow the law of Yoga, the aim of Yoga in all details of life. Here people do not do that, they live like ordinary people, quarrelling, gossiping, indulging their desires, thinking of Yoga only in their spare moments.
The Ashram is full of these things, because so many people are living in their ordinary mind and vital and allowing it to occupy the whole consciousness, doing only a nominal Yoga or no Yoga. It is quite natural therefore that such suggestions should come. You have only to reject them and remember for what you are here.
How sad it is that in spite of the Mother and yourself being here and the divine Force, Grace and Protection granted to us in abundance, we cannot master even our little natures! Other Yogis have not this advantage and yet progress much more than we do.
The Yogis who progress are those all whose thought is for their Yoga — here people are thinking most of the time of anything but that. But that is so elsewhere too. It is only by being in dead earnest that one can progress quickly.
“Dead” is an emphatic term for “complete”.
Cannot a wall of protection be erected around me so that the general Nature may not touch me?
Rather difficult if you keep open to the Generals. The wall will go down each time.
What are these Generals?
The Generals of the general nature, Ego, Demand and Desire.
In what way am I keeping myself open to the Generals?
The fact that your vital “goes out of the poise” and accepts them means that you keep yourself open to them. The sign that these things are no longer admitted is when the inner vital rejects them so that they become suggestions only and nothing else. There may arise a surge of suggestions or waves from the general nature, but they cannot get admission. It is only then that a wall can be kept in which one is untouched by the general atmosphere.
Whatever seriousness is necessary must come of itself from within. To be serious outwardly by rule is not needed.
Inner withdrawal is always much better than physical withdrawal.
You wrote, “There are simply a mass of tendencies and forces with which one has to become familiar.” But how to do it?
By experience and observation and increasing consciousness.
Usually we are not conscious of such tendencies or forces.
That means an insufficient consciousness. It is only by a direct consciousness that one can seize these things — the mind’s thought can’t do it.
I can’t make out how the ego, sex, inertia and vital difficulties have all come up together at the same time. Surely they were not in such a mess before? Can you not kindly make this thing clear?
There is nothing to be made clear. These things were there before but to some extent controlled by the will or not sufficiently recognised by the consciousness. They now come up in the physical nature separated from the rest in their true appearance and force. They are able to persist because of the tamas in your nature which is unwilling to make a sustained and constant reaction of a quiet, steady and resolute kind. To be firm in rejection and firm in the call for the higher consciousness is the only way to deal with these things.
After the above realisation I put forth my efforts to overcome the difficulties. My mind imposed a pressure on the vital for getting strength and wideness and also for giving up its sensitiveness. I must go on rejecting all that stands in the way.
That is the whole truth of the matter. If you do that, you will be doing the real thing and the only thing. It is no use simply observing and mentalising about the difficulties; one has to see once for all what they are and do what is necessary to get rid of them.
Even during the period when my inner being was detached from the lower movements, there was something that came up, stayed for two full days, spread some desires and then subsided. This “something” must have been very subtle and imperceptible.
It is simply the same thing always — the old nature coming up from the subconscient (or sometimes it may be from outside) in the form of suggestions and trying to recover hold as a substantial formation in the being. I do not know why your mind wants to find in it something subtle and remarkable or special and new.
I bring up this subject again because I would very much like to know how that “something” came and why it withdrew by itself.
But it is always like that. The outer reasons are mere suggestions. The one fact is this tendency of the recurrence as a rule of Nature so long as these forces have any chance of finding a lodging in you.
I was surprised to discover that one part of my being can remain in light and truth while another part remains in ignorance and falsehood.
Yes, that is so. There are many parts and movements in each plane and all do not get enlightened together.
The inertia persists so powerfully because there is no sufficient resistance on my part. Some parts of my being try at times to repel it, but seeing that nothing improves by their efforts, they withdraw into a tamasic passivity.
You are right. That is the real trouble — a laziness in the nature that cannot take the trouble to persist.
I observe that there is no definite movement in my physical consciousness towards a higher progress. Is it the same thing with other sadhaks and the earth consciousness itself?
Yes, for the time being.
Let me not compare my difficulties with N but with great sadhaks like Rishabhchand and Khirod.
Neither Rishabhchand nor Khirod nor anybody else is free from difficulties and from oscillations and alternations of progress and stoppage of progress.
When I asked why the evenings brought me a fall straight into inertia, you said, “Because the inertia is there in the physical consciousness and has made itself habitual — so the consciousness falls back to it.” Well, the inertia is there in the mornings also and yet I remain in the higher consciousness. What is the exact reason for the fall after 4 p.m.?
There is no mentally definite and rigidly effective reason for the thing coming in the evening rather than at 2 p.m. or in the midnight or the morning. For some people the fall comes in the evening, for some in the morning, for some at other times, and so too with the rise. But the alternations happen to most people in one law of rhythm or another. The times vary with people and even can vary with the same man. There is no definable reason for it being at a particular time except that it has made itself habitual at that time. The rest is a question of the play of forces which is observable but the reasons of which escape mental definition.
There is a certain amount of peace and silence so long as I keep myself plunged in writing. But when I go for meditation the same old thing returns — small and useless thoughts.
It is either because you lose the concentration by the cessation of the writing which helps to concentrate you — or else because you are invaded by the general atmosphere which is full of inertia and the small movements of the little physical mind and physical vital.
In the morning, after getting up from sleep, I find it difficult to get back to the higher consciousness or to bring about the same intensity as during the day.
That is so with most who do sadhana.
I cannot undertake to be telling you all the time all that is not perfectly Yogic in the details of your action from morning to night. These are things to see to yourself. It is the movements of your sadhana that you place before me and it is there that I have to see whether they are the right thing or not.
The actions are of importance only as expressing what is in the nature. You have to be conscious of whatever in your actions is not in harmony with the Yoga and to get rid of it. But for that what is needed is your own consciousness, the psychic, observing from within and throwing off what is seen to be undesirable.
When you make a fresh opening in me, is it not possible to inform me one day in advance, so that I may keep myself ready?
No, certainly not. Such a mental method would be of no use whatever. The experience must come spontaneously.
About the “push” from outside that I experienced, I don’t understand how it could rush in two opposite directions simultaneously — towards the deep psychic centre as well as towards the higher spiritual consciousness.
I do not see what there is in it that cannot be understood. Why should not one thing go into two separate parts? There is no uncrossable wall between different parts. Peace or any other spiritual power can enter mind and heart at the same time. Anger starting from the entrails can occupy heart and mind simultaneously.
I feel some positive and tangible presence on the top of the head that is doing the sadhana for me, something that is other than myself. Is there any truth behind this feeling and, if so, what exactly is this “something”?
If you feel it, if you are conscious of it — you can accept your feeling. If you merely think it without feeling or being conscious of it, then it may be merely a mental imagination. As to what it is, you must wait till you become aware. Asking the question with the mind is of no use; you must either become aware of it from within or get the knowledge from above.
When the forces of ego and desire failed to influence me openly, they started to act secretly on the subtle or unenlightened parts where I am still unconscious. It is due to this that I am unable to progress sufficiently.
Naturally if one is not awake within, the sadhana cannot be easy or complete.