To take interest, as some sadhaks do, in the general nature movements in the hope of getting some help for my own sadhana, does not seem to be my present stage. Not only that, I should even avoid such contacts till a strong and unshakable peace is established in me.
What do you mean exactly by the “general nature” movements — or help from them for the sadhana? The movements of the general nature are not usually helpful to sadhana, not at least until one has established such a basis in oneself that all is taken in the right way, the spiritual way, and then all can help in the growth of the consciousness — but that is not so at an earlier stage.
What I meant by “help from the general nature movements” was that perhaps by knowing what is going on in the general nature or atmosphere I can remain more vigilant towards the attacks from them and react before they enter.
That might be when one has developed sufficiently in peace and knowledge to react with sureness. But at this stage it is much better to keep yourself separate and look with a certain indifference at the doings of the others. If you have the peace and this equal and indifferent attitude, it is usually a sufficient defence.
Every part of the being is ignorant and opposes with some obscure element in it from time to time. One has to go on quietly and steadily till all the obscurities disappear.
Everything comes by a quiet development. It is no use being in a hurry and agitated because this or that has not yet come.
If people’s affections touch us even when we do not want it, how to remain free?
When one cannot keep oneself free, one must remain quiet and push the intruding element out.
I come to hear many things which are better avoided, because they disturb me. Should I resolutely avoid them? And why am I disturbed by them?
Because you pay attention to them and let them take hold of you. Unless you wear cotton wool in your ears or shut yourself in a closed room, you can’t help hearing all sorts of things. You have not to be affected by them or think about them, that is all.
For the last few days I have not been able to get enough sleep. Once I remained awake until 3 a.m.! Is this not due to some inner cause?
It is rather an outside influence. Do not open so much to those you mix with.
I wonder how an outside influence could have an effect on my sleep?
Why should it not? What is there to prevent it doing that? An outside influence can bring depression, disturbance, doubts, everything else. It can affect the health, the sleep, everything.
Among the people I mix with I do not know whose influence is adverse for me. Would you kindly point it out?
You have to find that out for yourself. There are people you mix with who have doubts, suggestions, depressions, jealousies, dissatisfactions with the Mother’s action. They can easily throw that on you without intending it. These influences are all around in the atmosphere. It is not sufficient to avoid this or that person. You have to learn to be on your guard and self-contained.
This morning a strong wave of depression and despair vehemently knocked at my environmental consciousness. I felt as if it came from the atmosphere.
Evidently these things come from the atmosphere — especially when somebody is being upset it can try to come.
I did not say you were upset. I meant when somebody in the Ashram is much upset, then the forces become strong and go about trying to upset others.
The famous dancer X came here and I went to D’s place to see him and also to see him dance. Such great artists usually do not visit the Ashram. The reaction of that event on my sadhana was the lowering of my consciousness. Was there any disturbance in the air?
Probably it was not altogether individual — it was in the air.
You wrote, “If you felt like that why did you want to go?” I admit it was a mistake, probably it was my vital which made me go. My inquiry was about the general rather than the individual effect.
The general effect was a quite absurd vital excitement rather than dullness — the Mother attached no more importance to X’s being here than to any other being here. Also he refused to dance. So what was all the excitement and pother about? Certainly not D’s singing, for there is nothing vital in that. Then?
Were not those who avoided the function also affected?
Not all. Some felt nothing but astonishment at the general excitement over nothing.
As I look back at the dancer’s visit here, it becomes clear that I unnecessarily opened myself to the general atmosphere and its turmoil. The lower vital enjoys such excitements and novelties which are harmful to the sadhana.
Yes. Whatever the state of the general atmosphere, there was no reason to open yourself to it. If one keeps on the peace and calm of the consciousness, no turmoil in the atmosphere can disturb it. You have only to keep yourself separate.
My immediate need is to strengthen my vital so that nothing from outside can get admittance. I feel that this strength is not so difficult to acquire.
Most of the sadhaks don’t seem to find it easy. They go on admitting all the time.
My request to the Mother is to build a protective wall around my environmental consciousness, so that nothing of the general atmosphere intrudes on me. Whatever arises from my own lower or subconscient nature I will manage by her help.